I've been thinking about my girls. I have 3. All are grown now with children of their own, it's nice that they share them with me. I like it. The extra hugs and kisses ... now who couldn't benefit from the love of little ones. I remember when I found out I was pregnant with my 1st child. I was scared ... oh so scared. I was unmarried and although I lived on my own and supported myself, family strings were still attached and the strong arm holding the strings was a prideful man who would not approve of the goings on that caused this pregnancy. I got over the fear of Dad eventually and continued with my life. As the baby grew I started to get some questions from co-workers and friends about names and if I wanted a boy or a girl. I had not even thought of that question. I was having a little girl and I wanted to call Her Missy but I knew on Her birth certificate I would put Melissa. I tell myself, even now. that if I had given birth to a little boy I would have accepted Him once I saw Him and they put Him in my arms. But oh how I wanted a little girl. I wanted to be a mommy for such a long time and this was my time coming up. I wanted to do a good job. I wanted to have a happy baby and I wanted Her to love me. She was a wonderful baby, a beautiful baby, She was very good and pretty easy to care for, smart but very small. Missy was born early but recovered from that quickly. She won over the patriarch of the family and He tried to keep Her ... that's another story.
My 2nd pregnancy was after I married. I didn't know I was pregnant, I thought I was sick. I didn't get sick with my 1st pregnancy. Cecil and I had been trying to get pregnant and we were starting to worry but try and try again ... we did get pregnant ... LOL I got huge. Quickly! By the time I was 3 months along I was unable to button my clothes. WHAT?? This isn't right. By the time I was 5 months along I looked like I was big enough to deliver so the doctor put me on a diet, which I didn't like ... at all. My due date was September 3rd. On Sept 4th I went to see the doctor and told Him I will not carry this baby this way any longer. He gave me an examination and told me to go the hospital He would meet me there and induce labor. WHEW. We lived in Oklahoma City, Oklahoma at the time and it is very early September and I am huge. I could not have stood it another day. The heat, the sun, the not being able to move it was just to much. I WANTED TO HOLD MY BABY IN MY ARMS ... then put my baby in bed and be able to roll over. So I went to the hospital, the doctor got there, induced my labor then He went away not telling me to cool my jets. I thought it was baby time. TA-DA Sara was born about 3 hours later and she had the biggest cheeks I had even seen outside of someone blowing a trumpet. I was in love!! Then she stretched out Her hand and touched me and I knew she would have a special place in my heart.
My 3rd pregnancy I had to beg and plead for. Cecil thought 2 children was good ... I guess because He came from a family with only 2 children and His father came from a family with only 2 children. But I wanted to have a say so. I wanted another child. We have 2 daughters, maybe this time we would have a son. We learned alot about my pregnancies with the earlier 2 pregnancies and labor. 1 thing I learned is that I know when I'm pregnant. Although I couldn't get a doctor to see me until I actually missed ...... you know what goes here ...... I was counting the days. There it was or wasn't. I made my doctor appointment and got confirmation. A big woohoo for me ... and Cecil ... we are having 1 more baby. Alot happened in the months to follow that had nothing to do with my pregnancy but the stress could have affected the baby, but I don't think it did. I'm sorry to say I don't exactly remember the due date it was January 6th, 7th or 8th. On January 6th I called Joe and Karen, friends of ours, because something wasn't right ... I was bleeding when I peed. I called them because they were going to care for Missy and Sara while I was in the hospital delivering this one. I had called Cecil and He was on His way home from His other job, His 2nd job, Now another thing we learned about my pregnancies and labor is that when I'm in early labor I don't feel the labor pain so I don't know I'm in labor. OK now we are at the hospital, I am in the exam room and Cecil is refusing to let the doctor leave because I may give birth when they step out. So they checked on me often. I did give birth less then an hour and a half later. I gave birth to a daughter. I did have 2 names picked out. 1 boy, Matthew, and 1 girl, Elizabeth. We now have a Beth. I will admit I shed a tear when they said "it's a girl" but once I held her in my arms, once I touched Her little fingers and felt the pressure of Her fingers touching me back, I knew she would be my baby forever and I was glad she was a girl.
I've learned through the years that Missy is very accepting. She is so loving and has such a caring heart that, as you are that is as She'll take you.
I've learned through the years that Sara sees the world differently. She doesn't like stress and disorder. She loves smiles and She will make you laugh to see one.
I've learned through the years that Bethy wants it Her way ... but don't we all. Bethy is loving and I will always remember that little shadow of mine that would let me hold Her every once in awhile, she would lay Her cheek on my cheek and I could feel butterfly kisses with every blink of Her eye.
Look at my girls now ... all grown up ... They are wonderful ... they will still hold my hand
I know today's blog is kind of long but I got involved and caught up in the moment or hour ...
thank you sticking with it